Loving yourself is not about vanity, it’s about knowing your worth and loving yourself for who you are. The fact is that it’s too easy to dislike yourself, rather than loving yourself. However, if you are going to lead a meaningful and contented life then you need to be happy. And to be happy, you […]
We suffer from an unfortunate misconception. We tend to think of self love and vanity as the same thing. They are, in reality, very different. Where vanity is blindness to one’s own faults and an overestimation of what we bring to the world, self love means recognizing the worst in ourselves and committing to be […]
Perfection is not achievable or even desirable, and that is OK. In fact, as humans, we are all a work-in-progress and will remain so for the entirety of our lives. We learn. We grow. And we are able to make significant changes — one of which may be to lose weight and improve our health. And no matter […]
Yoga Practicing: Ways to Get Inspiration and Reach Self-Realization There are few things that are more attractive than someone who is filled with self-love, confidence, and a wonderful sense of adventure, humor, and ease. All these things come from living a life that we enjoy, one that lets us be the best version of ourselves. […]
Before Jen could love another person she first had to find the love within that she had for herself. Finding self acceptance after weight loss can be one of the most empowering benefits of bariatric surgery. Today Jen shares that journey with us. Self Love After Obesity Jen did not engage in dating when she […]
With our weight loss surgery and recovery period behind us it is a good time to take stock of our relationships. What follows is a synopsis of “What Love is Not” from the documentary film LOVE with Gary Null, Ph.D. You may watch LOVE on Amazon. Self Actualizing Love Manifesting unconditional love requires two steps. First you […]
I’ve led a well-lived life after weight-loss surgery in 2003. Prior to that, when I was morbidly obese, I led a life half-lived. One might say I am making up for lost time. Years ago I came to the realization that my life is the dash between the date I was born and the date I die. […]
Love is the deepest and most fulfilling connection to the world. Yet it is sadly ironic that most of us don’t know what love is. This is the story of how I found true love after weight loss. Storybook Love I grew up with a romanticized notion of love: One day my prince would come […]
Here is a valuable exercise from the 7 Steps to Self-Love Workbook. It's about step 1, self-awareness. Find a quiet place and really think about these questions deeply. Then keep writing and writing all of your observations and the insights you learn about yourself. This was so invaluable to me when I was going through an inner transformation some years ago. #MyBariatricLife #inspiration #bariatrics #bariatric
7 Steps to Self #Love
Step 1 Self Awareness
Where are you playing the victim through blaming or judging or not taking responsibility?
Write out all of the negative self-talk in your mind (the stories). What do you tell yourself about you and the people around you? How do you beat yourself up and hold yourself back and stay stuck? Have a really good look at how you talk to yourself. You need to change the way you talk to yourself the way you would your best friend. Give yourself a pep talk every morning.
Understand your emotional responses. Thoughts trigger an emotion and an automatic response that doesn’t serve us or others well. Understand what triggers your emotional responses of anger, shame, sadness, worry, fear, doubt… When you start to feel that feeling, backtrack and think about what was the thought that triggered the feeling. What is it about what happened that caused me to feel this way? Keep asking yourself why it made you feel that way? What does it mean? Because the trigger is never about the other person; it is about ourselves, about our inadequacies and our low self esteem.
Make a list of all the habits and behaviors that are not serving you, where you’d like to break-through (messy, never on time, caught up in my head, always listen to others). Self awareness is about getting the ability to observe yourself from afar and recognizing how you respond to life through your actions, thoughts, and behaviors. Only when you change your actions, thoughts, and behaviors can you change the results you are getting in your life.
